Criticisms and Ideas Needed!

[TylerRouss]

In need of a trick to practice false deals, in need of a trick with a story, in need of a new project, i came up with this presentation. Probably been done many a time before, but I've never seen it, and i would love some ideas for how to best present the stories "theme" or the specific patter. I'm trying to make this trick have a 2-5 min storyline. My general style as a magician is natural, i try and make all my tricks seem as if it just occurred to me that something might work, and i want to try it. With this, id like to break away from that fairly limited style. Expand my performance, include some different types of presentations just to play with.

[video=youtube;l4Jhra6Qe-Q]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4Jhra6Qe-Q&feature=plcp[/video]

I am currently working with the idea of four boys, who go through some set of events, and emerge as men. (Jacks to Kings)
Also any advice on my bottoms, seconds, false ribbon spread, or controls would be thoroughly appreciated.

Thanks guys!
Tyler

 

[WakingHollow]

If the change of the jacks to kings is subtle people may not realize it, i have done many things where people have not seena face card change to another face card, i suggest make a spot card change to a face card, it is more contrasting and will garner more attention.

 

[TylerRouss]

Thanks WakingHollow! The current configuration of Jacks to Kings would be done with a story of the Jacks maturing or in some other way becoming the Kings, so I would hope it wouldn't be a problem, but never a bad thing to think about. Thanks for pointing it out!

 

[Arucard]

I really like your second deals, bottoms could be tightened a bit, but I can't do them (yet?) so kudos anyway!

For the story, whatever you end up using, just try to make each movement coincide with something. Like the idea of them going into the forest when you place the cards into the deck. Maybe they get 'turned around' (inverting the cards into the deck) and 'lost' (squaring up)? It looks great even with no story so I'm interested to see what you do with it.

 

[TylerRouss]

Thank you Arucard! I've been doing seconds for about a month now, and bottoms for close to five. This particular bottom I have only been doing for a week or so, and it involves a very different handling of the right hand. Perhaps that is why it doesn't look quite as good. Although i obviously need many, many more months of practice regardless. Any particular criticisms on either deal would be wonderful, I'm always seeking improvement.

Also! Just to clarify, this effect is not original. I have never seen it before, and I came up with it originally, and perhaps the exact methods I use to accomplish it are original, but I'm sure that it has been done before. It is just to normal of an idea to be original haha.